*My tea's gone cold, I'm wondering why
I got out of bed at all*
Here I set at the kitchen table hating life. Jeff and I at one time had the
perfect life; we had money and were extremely happy. He was a WWE Superstar and I was the WWE Diva known as Victoria but
that was until they decided to release him. At the time I wasn't thinking and I quit out of showing Jeff that I supported
him. Well now I have a job as at telemarketing office and the pay isnt even a third, hell not even a tenth, of what I used
to make and Jeff, he is trying to get his music career on the road so he's barely even home.
*The morning rain clouds up my window
and I can't see at all*
*And even if I could it'd all be grey,
but your picture on my wall*
My life seems to be falling apart before my eyes. I hate being alone all the
time but Jeff and I love each other. Looking at his picture always helps me struggle through day after day praying that soon
I'll be back in his arms where I can feel safe.
*It reminds me that it's not so bad*
*It's not so bad*
I know that this type of life isn't going to last forever it's just until we
get back ion our feet. I've been offered jobs in Indy organizations so has Jeff, but for now we want to go life without wrestling.
But sometimes it's rather difficult to keep to that belief.
*I drank too much last night, got bills
to pay*
*My head just feels in pain*
All the alcohol in the house ended up in my body over the first few weeks of
Jeff being gone. I grew rather accustom to Vodka fast. I always had a bottle by my side for when I get lonely. I try to drink
away my pain and loneliness. All the hangovers were hell but I never learn. Once again I feel like shit and now I have to
go to work.
I struggle to get myself dressed and decent looking for work. I know that I
still had my "Victoria" image to maintain so I couldn't just go out looking
like plain old Lisa.
*I missed the bus and they'll be hell
today*
*I'm late for work again*
I've been warned over and over that I'm going to be fired but the boss won't
fire me. He likes being able use me as a conversation topic, "Yeah you think you have some dope workers, I have Victoria
the beautiful WWE Diva. She has to work for me to live." Damn I hated that I was stooping to this level but I had no other
choice and this actually let me experience what some of my fans had to do day after day.
A lot of my co-workers know that I've turned to alcohol for help. They all
assume one of these days I'm going to drink myself to death. Boy wouldn't that make a great headline in the newspaper, "WWE's
Victoria found dead...cause for death most likely alcohol intoxication"?
*And even if I'm there they'll imply
that I might now last the day*
A lot of them also assume that I'm suicidal and that during one of my trips
to the restroom I'll just end my life then and there. Everyone can see how unhappy that I am but I love Jeff and he's my life
support; with him in my life nothing can stop me from living.
*And then you call me and it's not so
bad*
*It's not so bad*
I come back from a coffee break to find my phone ringing. I quickly get my
phone set on, not really wanting to deal with a crazy customer but I answer it anyway.
"Hello my sweet," Jeff said in his sexy accent.
"Jeff?" I gasp, forgetting that I had an audience and his name got their attention.
"Yeah baby. How is it going?"
"Oh. It's okay Jeff. I miss you though." I start to cry, not caring that I
was being watched.
"Please don't cry?"
"I'm sorry. I miss you so much. I hate not seeing you and holding you. Please
tell me that you'll be home soon."
"Yes sweetie. I'll be home soon. The CD is wrapped up for now so I'll be home
this weekend to spend some time with my girl."
"Yay!!! I'm so happy. Jeff, will you hold me when you get home till I fall
asleep in your arms. I want to feel safe again." I said even though about fifty people are staring at me.
"Oh baby that sounds wonderful."
*I want to thank you for giving me the
best day of my life*
*Oh just to be with you is having the
best day of my life*
"That's wonderful. Can't wait till I see ya."
"Me either. Love you!"
"I love you." I said hanging up the phone. I take a look around at everyone's
questioning eyes. "What the hell are you all looking at?" I scream.
"Was that Jeff Hardy?" some girl finally got the guts to ask.
"What in the hell do you care. It's none of your damn business." I yell throwing
my headset across the room. "I quit." I walk straight pass everyone not once looking back. Straight out the door and to the
street. It's at least three hours till the next bus so I just walk even though it is raining.
*Push the door, I'm home at last and
I'm soaking through and through*
After a block and a half of walking in the pouring rain, I walked into my small
but livable house slipping my shoes off.
*Then you handed me a towel and all
I see is you*
Surprised by Jeff's presence I took the towel and tossed it aside I threw my
arms around him. "Sweetie, you're getting me all wet," he said still holding me tightly.
"I don't care. I want to feel you in my arms right now."
"Good," Jeff said as he led me down the hall to our bedroom that I usually
slept in alone. He laid me down on the bed and kissed my cheek softly. He then began to remove my wet clothes.
Hours later I was still in his arms and it felt good. "I have a question to
as ya, Lisa."
"Yes?"
"How would you feel about being Mrs. Jeffrey Nero Hardy?"
"Oh my god!?!? Are you serious???" I sat up and stared at him in disbelief.
"I've never been more serious!"
"Then my answer is yes. A million times yes."
"I'm so glad, here," he said sliding an elegant diamond ring on my finger.
"It's beautiful."
"Just like you," he said and I kissed him. "Also girl, we're moving to a better
house that will only be five minutes away from the studio. That is if you want to go."
"Are you crazy? Of course I want to go. I'll be able to see you more."
*I want to thank you for giving me the
best day of my life*
*Oh just to be with you is having the
best day of my life*
"I love you so much Lisa."
"I love you Jeff. You've made me so happy! If I would die tomorrow I would
do it as one very happy woman."
